Welcome back to the show. I’m doing a solo episode today, wanting to give an update about my healing journey with this disc herniation. And part of me has really resisted doing this episode because it’s hard. This experience in my life is really hard. So talk about the discomfort zone. I am fully in it. One, because I…

I never thought that I would experience this type of injury because of my yoga practice and my awareness of the importance of counteracting the position of sitting. I thought I was doing all the right things. And to some extent I was. And I just kayak a lot for work and for play and twisting and sitting.

It’s a lot and schlepping boats and lifting boats and doing that for 30 years, now over 30 years, it takes a toll even when you’re doing things, you know, quote unquote, right, even when you are paying attention. And then also difficult because I think of myself as having a lot of body awareness and I felt the red flags. This is what’s disappointing is I…

felt the red flags, but again, I was, and I said this in my last episode, I was a bit cocky about, know, well, I’ll be able to heal it or my yoga practice will take care of it and, or getting back to the gym and strengthening my glutes will take care of it. And when I, you know, was starting to experience sciatica, I was really holding on to, you know, wanting to believe that it was,

muscular. And then there’s also now it’s I’m in my fourth week and the pain is much better. I can, I’m sleeping well without having to use muscle relaxants. And that’s the other thing I never, I’ve never been a person to be taking, you know, Advil, Tylenol, muscle relaxants. I’ve always slept really well.

And, you know, with the pain, sleeping is so important for healing and becoming open to, yes, taking muscle relaxants because it helped me sleep and it helped with the pain. And I’m still taking, you know, some Tylenol and Advil and wanting to wean myself off and accepting that it’s temporary, right? So moving through that.

And also, this is only my second major injury. So I’m 51, only my second major injury, which is, I’m so grateful for. And I’ve been able to heal myself pretty well and quickly in the past. And so this is taking a lot longer than…

I wanted, and I’m sure some of you can relate. This is probably true for anyone who gets injured. And so there’s a lot of challenge and it’s having me rethink how I move through the world. And this is, breakthroughs come from breakdowns. I do believe that. It’s just that it’s really sucky when you’re going through a breakdown. And especially when for me,

This breakdown is tied to my body, which is, you know, I lead a very active lifestyle. It’s also tied to making a living because I teach kayaking, I coach kayaking for a living and being off the water can affect, yeah, how I make my living. And so that’s a big challenge. And so having to rethink and get creative, which…

I have been and rethinking, you know, one of the rethinking is that I’m realizing how much pressure I’ve put on myself to do more and more and to schedule so many private instruction and PIs, I mean, let’s redo that one. So I’ve come to see that how I’ve moved through the world, one of the ways I’ve moved through the world is wanting my business to succeed and putting pressure on myself to do more and more and stay really busy. And I’ve done this for years. And I just have had the mindset of like, yeah, of course I can do it. Like I’ve done it, I’m healthy, I’m strong, I love it.

Right? And this injury is showing me maybe the reality that I’m gonna, that it’s important for me to slow down, not stop. And I’m not saying that I can’t teach kayaking anymore. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying that, you know, I had already started this year to think, okay, max four days a week of teaching kayaking with the exception of certain specialty programs.

like Costa Rica, Creek Week, Find Your Flow, which I offer only once a year, so fine. And I would still, I still broke my own rules or like what I was trying to do this year and scheduled people when I had wanted to take some time off. And so it’s just driving home of setting boundaries, which I talk about a ton, right? I coach boundaries.

in mental agility mastery, eight week course, and I really believe in freedom within the framework. And so that’s one big realization for me is slow down, right? You don’t have to over schedule yourself. And part of that comes from a self worth if I’m being really honest, which is one of the reasons why I resisted doing this episode, because it’s very vulnerable for me, right? It’s about being.

know, pushing myself so hard, feeling like I need to, and I don’t want to disappoint people, and I want to reach my goals, and I want to, you know, be there for people if they want to do a day of instruction on that day, I’m going to do it on that day. And also I have, you know, I do believe in making a good living being in the outdoor industry. That is one of the conversation changes that I’m out to make with my business is that you can be an outdoor industry professional and make good money because it is a profession and especially someone like me who’s been in it for 30 years. And I actually did a webinar on, you know, for paddling on work harder, work smarter, not harder. Right. And so again, the river is a metaphor for life.

Right? So if I’m coaching and working on working smarter, not harder on the river, I want to take those concepts and bring them into my life. Right? And start working smarter, not harder. And I love my clients. I love teaching kayaking. It’s super fun. And I am going to get back in my boat and I’m, you know, the healing is happening and I look forward to that time. And my

Yeah, one of my goals for the next year is to work and beyond is to work smarter, not harder, right? Get into relationship with the current, get into relationship with life, into relationship with my body and get real about what is sustainable, what’s sustainable. And so that is a good awakening.

And the other thing that I’m in, this is the last day of Find Your Flow. And I am really realizing with the not disappointing people that I have put pressure on myself to have to be at the, like at every part of the program. And I’ve known this about myself, okay. But I haven’t been able to break out of that feeling that if I’m not there or like that they won’t.

get as much out of it. And this We Can Find Your Flow, it’s really showing me that I can be creative. Again, I can work smarter. So I miss being on the river with folks. And yes, I would definitely add value if I were on the water. And my co-instructor, Maddie Payne, who is awesome, so grateful for her. And she’s been working with me for years now, four or five years.

She has been consistent and so she is taking the lead this week. And what I’m seeing is that she’s doing an amazing job. The participants are getting amazing results. They’re getting their roles. They’re refining their skills. They’re upleveling their skills. They’re building their confidence. And Maddie is building confidence in her ability to lead. It’s amazing to see she’s being thoughtful. And because I have to step back, she’s having to do the things that I was doing. And she’s really stepping into that role. And so I have an opportunity to mentor and that is really actually empowering for both of us. And I’m just really grateful and joyful to see that. And

I can, I’m teaching yoga in the morning. So bringing the mental agility piece, the warming up the body, the mind, the heart to prepare for the day. I’m doing some chalk talks that have been helpful and doing video reviews. So Maddie takes video during the day and then we do video review in the evening. And that combination has really helped and added value to the what folks are accomplishing on the water. And it’s wonderful. And so that is really, this difficult situation has made me step back, let go of control, which is really good for me. I’m seeing how I can definitely be a control freak and seeing that it’s okay.

The program is awesome. Folks are getting amazing results and working even more collaboratively with Maddie and then Mallie who’s cooking amazing meals. Not only is she an amazing creative private chef, she is bringing her energy. She’s also a paddler. It’s just really special week that really enhances community and we eat well.

We come together, we’re learning, we’re having fun on and off the river. And so…

One thing that I love about recording these podcasts is I have aha moments as well. And the working smarter, not harder, letting go and being creative, rethinking how I’m moving through the world, not only from a physical perspective, which I am, and I’m realizing that there were some yoga poses that I was doing that were not helpful, that I thought were helpful. I’m realizing that how I was engaging my core was not optimal.

And so I’m re-learning 51 years of habit patterns, is a challenge and it’s very doable. And it’s just like anything else you want to take on, whether it’s kayaking or stand up paddle boarding or whatever sport you’re learning at a later age, that doesn’t mean that you cannot learn something new and retrain your body, retrain your brain. We have neuroplasticity and I’m so grateful. And…

I also want to say how grateful I am for the support around me, right? All the folks here at Find Your Flow, my husband, Andrew, who actually drove me to Raleigh to teach a standup paddleboard instructor course, which I was able because of, well, one, because it’s an instructor course, the instructor candidates, right, are leading and teaching. And so I don’t have to do as much. And even though I couldn’t demo, it also allowed me to step back and get creative on how I put the candidates out front and coach them verbally, which I’m grateful that I do have really good skills with that. And I was able to move position on the standup board. That’s what I love about standup boards. You don’t have to sit, you can lie down and listening to my body. that went really well. Again, the results were…

Really good. And I didn’t feel like anything, you know, huge was missing besides the fact that I couldn’t paddle around and I love demoing and I love paddling around. It’s the sitting in the car, the sitting, the sitting in the car still is tough for me. So I have to let go of that as well. And that’s why Andrew was driving me around, which I’m very grateful. So.

That’s what I’ve got for you today.

So another one last thing that this injury is teaching me is to be flexible with my morning routine. There are things about my morning routine that I’m keeping. Those of you who have worked with me know about my morning routine. So, you know, it would be scraped tongue, brushed teeth, oil pull, nose oil, lemon water.

And then yoga, meditation, you know, walk before I eat breakfast. And now my morning routine looks like keeping all the same things when I wake up in terms of scraping my tongue, brushing my teeth, oil pulling. And then I take a shower, hot shower. It feels so good. So I’ve had to modify hot shower here at the house we’re staying. There’s a sauna. So I go get in the sauna.

And then I walk because walking feels good. So I walk and then I do PT exercises and retraining the core and then start my day. Right. Then, well, I’ve been teaching yoga and then eating breakfast, but being flexible while not giving everything up. You know, as I’ve worked with clients over the years, something traumatic or an injury happens or something happens and the entire morning routine goes out the window and I know that my morning routine helps to keep me steady, right? Even in the face of this injury, even in the face of the pain is the worst in the morning. You know, I have my routine, I know what I’m doing next. It keeps my mind focused on moving forward and that’s been really helpful. So lots of learning in the last four weeks and I’m sure it will continue.

Hopefully this was helpful for you, if you’re listening, for some aspect of your life. So let’s rethink how we move in the world, how we see our self worth, how we’re reaching our goals, working smarter, not harder, keeping a framework, right, a morning routine that helps us stay grounded and helps us heal, helps us move forward and be willing to let go and shift and empower others and know that you don’t have to do everything. You don’t have to be the one that does everything.

So have a great week. I’ll be back next week with another interview and let’s keep working smarter, not harder.